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Valentines Day And The Loneliness

We have all grown up aware of the romance that takes place on February 14th. This worldwide celebration where candy, flowers and gifts are exchanged between loved ones, comes in the name of what and who? A man named St. Valentine from the ancient Roman ritual of Lupercalia that welcomed spring to the card-giving customs of Victorian England.

The Origins Of Valentines

While some believe that Valentine’s Day is celebrated in the middle of February to commemorate the anniversary of St. Valentine’s death others claim that the Christian church may have decided to place St. Valentine’s feast day in the middle of February in an effort to “Christianise” the pagan celebration of Lupercalia. Celebrated February 15, Lupercalia was a fertility festival dedicated to Faunus, the Roman god of agriculture, as well as to the Roman founders Romulus and Remus.

Valentines And What It Means

For some, Valentine's Day is a clear reminder of how lonely and single they are. To add to this narrative many of us often get caught up with the portrayal of what the day should be like from what we see on TV or social media, often forgetting that most of what we see is not real life.

The reality is just because we see people in relationships on Valentine's Day it doesn't mean that they are immune to loneliness or are genuinely happy. The struggle some people have in differentiating entertainment to reality can put a strain on both them and their partner, causing conflict, stress and a persistent need to outwardly appear happy when they are not. This feeling can heighten on February 14th and cause poor Mental Health.

Valentines And Mental Health

Mental health comes in a vast array of symptoms. Loneliness is an associated form which can cause a lot of mental problems. Feeling lonely doesn't always mean that you are physically alone, you can have friends, family and a partner around and still not feel connected. Valentine's Day can be a trigger and heighten this loneliness.

In order to overcome this feeling of loneliness we suggest if you are in a relationship speak to your partner and let them know your expectations for the day. You can also plan the celebration as you would want it and just ask them to support you in being with you on the day. If you are single, make it special for yourself by buying yourself something nice. You can even surround yourself with other single friends and do something nice for yourselves.


Whether it’s you who suffers with poor mental health, or it’s your partner, or your friend it can be very hard, especially when the whole world is celebrating a loved ones day. Just remember you are not alone and there are support groups to help you get through. We are here if you just want a friendly chat or someone to cheer you up. We have conversations that are serious and we try to add some laughter into them, to help add an edge to what maybe a challenging situation, so grab a coffee and listen to our Valentines Special episode, you're guaranteed to laugh.

If you would like to speak to anyone about feeling lonely check out

British Red Cross – Connecting Communities

Listen To Podcast Ep; 9 Valentines Special

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